Thursday, September 24, 2009

Being a mom is hard....

Sometimes I think that people think that being a mom is not that hard. It comes so natural to most of us that we don't take time to think about what we are doing. Having Regan be my first child was delightful. She was an "easy baby" she always slept, ate, played etc exactly how I wanted her to and has been a very easy child to "manage." Lauren on the other hand was trouble from the start. She never slept, was fussy, crazy and all the things that Regan wasn't. There are different things that I love about my children, but sometimes I find myself treating them the same when they are SO VERY DIFFERENT.
I was observing them in school today ( there is a booth so they don't I was watching) I saw the way they interacted with other children as well as with themselves. I found myself crying, A LOT. When they are at home I do not take the time to watch them and really realize their personalities. I subconsciously expect the same things from them, even though they are different people and respond differently to things.
I was crying because I realized that all the things that I find annoying about Lauren is just how she is. I realized that I need to treat her differently then I do Regan, that she needs different things. I love my little Lolo and hate how ignorant I have been about her differences. Lauren always wants my attention and hangs on me all the time. I get so frustrated sometimes because I feel like I can never get anything done, but she needs me more than the dishes need to be done and more than pretty much anything else that needs to be done and that I need to be better about giving her that.

I aim to be a fantastic mom to my children, sometimes I just need to be smacked in the face once in a while and reminded how beautifully unique my daughters are.